We're in a tough spot. Some of it is due to poor decisions on our part. Some of it is due to circumstances we could not have foreseen. Some of it is just bad luck. (Or lack thereof.)

Micah's lead level did not go down as far as we had hoped it would. It is currently under the "safe" level. But the more I research on my own and read studies about lead exposure the more I am convinced there really is no "safe" level. Somewhere, somehow he is still being exposed to lead in our house. Which also means Téah is being exposed to it. Of course, as parents, John and my immediate reaction is to say, "let's get our kids away from any possible exposure!"

However, it is a bit more complicated than that.

We are completely invested in this house. Heart, body, mind, soul. Completely invested. John (and many family members and friends) have spent hours putting their time, effort and love into this house. I honestly cannot even begin to list the things that have been done since we bought this house back in May of 2006. I know from the outsiders perspective this should not matter. Our childrens' health should be more important than any of that. And it is. Please believe me on this point. But it is hard to give up a dream and something you have put blood, sweat and tears into for almost 3 years.

There's also the financial side of the situation. We did not buy this house with the intent of selling it to make money. We didn't even buy it with the intent to make back what we put into it. We bought it with the intent to make it a home for our family and friends to enjoy and feel welcomed. However with selling comes the question, "Can we make the money back that we have put into it?" The answer is more than likely, "no." Not in today's market. Possibly not ever. So how can we possibly afford to move out, find a SAFE, lead-free house and try to sell this one. We can't figure out a way to make it work.

So now we're thinking about trying to rent it out. We'll see where that goes. And please know that we have no idea where this is going to lead. By reading this you have been subjected to my thinking out loud.

Please, please, please. If you own a home built before 1978 and you have young children or are currently pregnant, spend the money and have the lead-testing done. DO NOT mess around with lead. Just don't.

It has been a long time since my last post and for that, I'm sorry. I often think about blogging then find something else to do (and mind you, it's probably NOT more important. I'm just good at wasting time.) Since my last post (in no particular order)

1. We went to Cincy and saw TWO Over the Rhine Concerts. It was amazing. We also had a great time hanging out with Jill and Jeremy! Téah loved it and keeps asking when we're going back to "jilly's house."

2. John threw me a surprise party for my birthday! I will admit I knew about it ahead of time, but it was John's fault. He told the three year old about it and expected me not to find out! It was a lot of fun. And yes, I'm now 30.

3. Christmas, of course. Some present were finished in time, some were not and will be completed for other holidays. Next year I will plan ahead a little better.

4. I went to TN and NC with the kids, my parents and Gavin (my nephew). John kept things together here in Pittsburgh. We had a ton of fun visiting with my brother, Richard, his wonderful wife, Priscilla and their three kids (Gideon, Elliotte and Eden.) Téah had sooooo much fun playing with all of her cousins and I learned that Micah is a pretty good little traveler.

5. Micah has been dealing with asthma on and off for a couple of months. It's no fun for anyone. He's now on a daily inhaled medicine (via nebulizer) and we're getting better at finding ways to help him "keep his mask on."

6. We got Micah's lastest lead level back and it is NOT as low as we had hoped. We are no seriously considering selling our house and moving. I would ask that you remember us in your prayers with this decision. We're really in a tough spot.

7. We got another dog! (yes, we're officially crazy!) Emma now has a doggy brother named Tiny. Tiny is a 130 lb. Great Dane who is a big baby and loves to be loved and is great with the kids and with Emma (who we love, but honestly she is a bit of a spastic dog!) There are pictures below.

That's all for now! I'll post again soon this time. I promise. (ok, I hope).

Living in a big old house with a particularly large yard within city limits is fun. I love having our garden, being outside with the kids, having a dog and room for her to run. I love the high ceilings and spaciousness of the rooms. I love the woodwork and charm of the house. What don't I love? lead.

When we first moved into this house in 2006 we knew lead could be an issue for Téah. Unfortunately we had no idea how big of an issue it would end up being. For reference: anything over a level of 10 is considered lead poisoning. However, the goal is to have a level of 0, of course. And more and more research is coming out showing that any level can have ill-effects both now and later on in adolescence and adulthood. Lovely, right?

Téah's level initially went up when we moved in back in May of 2006. So we decided to make one room "safe" for her since she was learning to crawl and generally be a lot more mobile. We opted for the family room. All 3 of us slept, ate, watched tv, hung out, etc. in that room. We had no working kitchen at the time and only minimal bathroom facilities for awhile. It was an interesting time! Téah did learn to crawl in this room - I kept it mopped and cleaned and regularly wet-dusted the rest of the room so it would be safe for her. I also made sure she was eating iron, calcium and vitamin C-rich foods to help with the amount of lead absorption in her body. So we went back for a follow-up lead check. Imagine our surprise when it went UP. A considerable amount! We were a bit flabbergasted and understandably very upset. No parent wants to be responsible for any ill-effects on their child now or later on in life. So we immediately moved out of the house, started bunking in John's parents' basement (they were extremely gracious and hospitable!) in hopes we could discover the sources of lead and be done with it. John found a professional lead inspector, paid a pretty penny and had a full day of lead testing done at the house. It was intense. We discovered it was all over the place - much more than we had anticipated. The worst part was the absolute highest level of lead in the house was on the floor of the family room. That's right, the floor Téah learned to crawl on. I honestly thought I might throw up when I heard that bit of news. So we had carpet installed, we sealed, primed, painted trim, painted the outside of the house... etc. It was A LOT of work and John did A LOT of it! When we were feeling ok about the state of things we moved back in the house. This was in January of 2007. About the time I found out I was pregnant with Micah.

We had Téah's lead tested a few times in there and it continually came down. Although never ALL the way down to zero which means she is still exposed to it regularly.

fast forward to this July:

Micah went in for his 9 month appt. and I, with his pediatrician's advice, opted to have his lead level tested now rather than wait for the normal 1 year checkup when most parents have this tested. Thank goodness we tested it early! Micah's initial reading came back at 19! Then with a full blood draw it came back at 15.8. Way too high. Obviously something was going on. John and I were pretty sure that it was from some work being done on the back porch that had stirred up more dust than normal. We also know that the front porch ceiling is an issue (working on that). We have since come to find out that the lead level in our water is pretty high. Filtered water only around these parts, thank you. Micah's level was tested this week and it has come down to 11. So it is on its way down - but honestly, not enough for me. I want both of my children to be completely lead free. And I don't know if that will ever happen living in this house.

I am struggling with enjoying my house now. I am tired of the constant worry. Tired of the constant dusting and mopping and washing of hands. I am tired of the endless projects that are never finished. I also know that this is a time period and hopefully one day I'll look back on it and everything will be fine. But it is a very frustrating time for us right now. I never wanted to sacrifice my children's health for a house. And although know ultimately this is not the case it is hard.

So it comes to this: I have a love/hate relationship with my house. And if Micah's level is not down a considerable amount more at his next check John and I have seriously talked about selling this house. And I can't even begin to tell you how much I DON'T want to do that.

The lesson to take away? Lead is nothing to mess with. If you are moving into an old house and have young children, pay the money (yes, it's expensive) and have a thorough lead inspection down. Our children are well worth the investment.